Absent camaraderie

My friends,

Today I write to you from my heart. Today I write to you because I feel the mixed emotions among my my fellow Malaysian, my friends and my family, some are over joyed, some are sadden and disspointed and some like me still remain very worried.

What happen to us?

Personally, I cried while waiting for the election result, I cried when I got the result in relief, then I cried after I got the result in the heartfelt outcry out by some of my friends. I cried at the thought of this polling and I ponder upon how divided we've become. I cried for the division in religion and cried for fear of loosing what makes us Malaysia the vibrant and social society.

I cried when I think about how the oppression we felt seems bigger to us then to what we have imposed upon others.

I cried how we lack the understanding of what racism truly mean.

I cried because some people feels they have lost hope. I cried in vain of loosing the camaraderie among us.

From a far, I'm not crowded with media bombardment everyday, by flags, ceramah. I'm not forced or dragged into choosing, I chose it.

I listened to all my friends, silently, I listened to the complains, the allegations, the wants and don't wants, and I explore. I listen to advice of a friend to engage directly with politician, and I did. I've shared with you my work, my findings. I've invited you to discuss, and invited politicians to discuss.

I wish it is easy to say let the bygone be bygone, but we have both hurt each other in this process. I assure you that both parties have taken the campaign too far in inflicting fear, but never really discussed the policies.

I can tell you that you and I, we failed in taking control on this responsibility. We fail to push the campaign in the right direction instead we readily accept to be a parrot, merely repeating after politician, we don't even know if it rings any truth. We spread the lies, the hate, we made the contribution to our society social and moral distruction. We made it worst than the politician. We played victim, we cry wolves, we point fingers at each other.

We are a society of double moral.

We accuse each other for being racist, yet we are do not understand what it means to be racist when we hit an Indian man because we think we can take one look at a person and judged that he is not Malaysian :(

We labelled and called each other names. We discriminate by race for employment, We ignore the cry of victims because they are "different" from us.

We crossed all boundries, we risked everything, our friendship, our patriotism, our moral and even our faith in this election. How can I not cry, the price is too big than I'm willing.

We forget what we are fighting for and for whom we are fighting this for. We loose all patriotism when we hang our own flag upside down. It's an ultimate betrayal even if the intention is as a protest. And yet some is willing to accept and tolerate as a symbol of mourning.

Let me reiterate to you, any action that shows your lack of patriotism to our national symbol, is unacceptable and intolerable. There are no excuses.

When we want to chose a leader who do not lift hands to ikrar, when we change the national flag without the acceptance of majority, when  do not sign negaraku but  many didn't stop and ask, who is this fight for? If it is for us Malaysian, then where is the patriotism? Malaysian are all of us, not just party supporters.

We fail to respect our society when we spread lies and stories to scare our people about "bangla" who loves chinese girls and will grab their purses and cause a friend sleepless night?

When we asked our people to disrespect the system, instead of the parties themselves take the responsibility to ensure they can represent people to ensure the system are working? If they can't do that one job, why are they disappointed that people don't vote them?

It is not easy being the government.

When we belittle our indepandence history. When we allow ourself to be manipulated, to be fed with hate and we then chant the hate back, we failed.

The worst of all, when we sell our religion to politics, we are willing to do things that are so fundamentally wrong, because we are so focus on the little things, we forget to be a good muslim, a good christian, a good hindu or a good buddhist and others.

This is democratic country. I've never seen such a campaign, I've never seen such a rise in people, the interest, waking up late, holding each other's hand in support, breaking boundaries to fight on both side for what we believe in. I'm excited to embrace that challange. It is unfortunate that our intention is always good, but our ways have lost.

I cannot stop crying, I cried while typing this, I know I will carry this sadness until I feel comfortable that my friends can find it in them to give support to each other regardless of their political ideologi, their religion, their race, and their parties.

It's been too emotional rides, people forget it's politics not personal.

Like you I've been offended many times. Some of my non malay friends feels like an outcast right now. I feel like an outcast for the last 6 months when I'm being accused  as kafir (no longer a muslim) by PAS. Worst, I was more offended when they are saying it's just an imply not an accusation. I'm being accused as lesser citizen because I'm mixed race not a pure malay by my PR friends. I'm being accused by friends who doesn't even realised what they have been saying indirectly, because they are so consumed by hate and frustration. I'm still offended today.

Like you, I'm hurt, but I know my friends. I've grown to love them, I know their hearts and I know what politics do to a person.

This is politics. This is real politics. Politics forces us to take sides but in choosing government not in our relationship and our friendship.

Friends,

Do you know that we are maturing? You and I, we need to get use to this, we will continue to have this going forward. We will never again get the comfortable easy win, always hard work campaign, always emotional, and always feeling frustrated when we cannot convince others to agree to our own political ideologi.

Friends,

I assure you, I care about you. The silent voters care about you.

I have my own worries and fear, I will fight for the better life, for preservation and for what I believe is important within my political ideology. I'm not too proud to change if I see change suits me.

But I ask you to recognize that my fear and worries are real to me as yours are to you.

How far apart will we grow from each other when we are each other's people?

Don't be surprise at how many spectators, the silent majority. Don't label them as dumb, fatwa-kan utusan, tengok media mainstream sahaja, orang kampung, truth is you don't know anything about them in their personal time, and vice versa.

Respect is two way street. I ask PR to respect my voice and other BN voters in the recent election. There is just more of us who share the same idelogy, but yours is growing too, if you can, please acknowladge and recognize that.

You cannot protest your way through democracy. You need to earn it, win us over.

I ask upon you to please, we all want to be heard, it is not just you who wants to be heard. The people have spoken, give our Prime Minister a chance to do his job. His mandate.

Patience is not the ablity to wait, patience is the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.

I'm here for you if you need me, I hope you will do the same for me.

Hugs,
Fida